Rodney Harrison is N0T going crazy about the gotdamn Superbowl, okay?!

Just in case you were wondering, Patriots BAMF Rodney Harrison is not haunted by that miraculous Manning-To-Tyree play (name still pending) of Superbowl XVII. Although Harrison was covering Tyree during his improbable catch, boston.com reports that the Patriots veteran has finally accepted "the catch" as "inexplicable."

"Not in a million years does he make that catch again," said Harrison. "I don't have any regrets on it. I saw the ball, went up for it, and did my best to grab it out. It goes on his head, so what can you say?"


This photo does not exist in Rodney Harrison's imagination.

It's almost four months past the Superbowl, and now Harrison finally accepts Tyree's catch as crazy? I know just about every New Yorker accepted the catch as crazy once they took another shot of Jack Daniels after thinking Eli was sacked. Trust me, I know...*sighs* gotdamnit Kenny.

But as well as I remember that play (which I don't), "the catch" was definitely inexplicable, something sent from the football gods to finally destroy the Patriots, including their ever-cocky safety. Unfortunately, some don't take losing so well and resort to profound existentialism:

"I think you have to understand that certain things happen that you just can't explain."

Sounds like somebody's got a case of the SUPERBOWL PWNG3! If only we could all just cheer him up with a BrianBillickesque kiss.

- K.H. (Took four months to get over that hangover)

Report: Marvin Harrison is indeed a wide receiver in the NFL

According to ESPN, Colts receiver and the NFL's only "nice guy" Marvin Harrison was involved in a shooting outside his bar in North Philadelphia earlier this week. Supposedly, the perennial Pro-Bowler got into an argument with one of his patrons before the man left in his car, where he was then shot in the hand. Reports claim that the weapon fired, registered under Harrison's name, was a "custom, Belgian hand gun that shoots .50 caliber bullets." That's almost as bad as Maurice Clarett's AK-47 under the passenger seat.


This is the best off-field action shot of Harrison I could find.

To any football fan not living under rock for the past decade, this whole thing is really weird. I'm legitimately shocked by the fact that a) Marvin Harrison is possibly involved in a crime, b) Marvin Harrison is from the ghettoes of North Philadelphia, c) Marvin Harrison owns a bar, d) Marvin Harrison owns a gun, d) I'm writing a post about the most boring athlete in NFL history. Honestly, I envisioned Harrison spending his free time playing chess, perfecting his moustache, or something else that's more boring than playing in Indianapolis for 12 years.

But, since this is the NFL, where receivers are only signed with a three-crime minimum, I guess I'm not that surprised. I mean, as long as Peyton isn't caught with hookers or anything.

- K.H. (Really hopes he doesn't regret that last sentence)

David Harrison will (expletive) kill you

Pacers center David Harrison was suspended one game for telling an official that he was going "to (expletive) kill" Spurs ginger center Matt Bonner after a seemingly offensive offensive foul. While being escorted off the court, Harrison was so (expletive) pissed off that he (expletive) threw a (expletive) tantrum on the way to the (expletive) locker room that he need a few (expletive) stitches in his head.


Moments later, Chris Kaman was found (expletive) dead under the basket.

Considering that Harrison is, in fact, an Indiana Pacer molded under the unparalleled guidance of Stephen Jackson and Jamaal Tinsley, this shouldn't be much of a surprise. Well, considering this is the NBA, this actually should be expected. Players like Bonner should actually be...well, (expletive) killed.

Upon notice that Harrison was suspended, Bonner, who happens to be the only man on the Spurs roster with a sense of humor, responded, "You only get a technical for that? Will Ferrell got ejected for that in Semi-Pro." In the Spurs locker room, jokes are rare, but you know what they say, 60 percent of the time, it works every time.

In a rare, yet captivating, emotional moment for San Antonio forward Tim Duncan, the ten-time All-star replied, "Ha."

So, touche to Mr. Harrison and Mr. Bonner for allowing me to quote Anchorman for the first time in this blog. Just don't (fucking) kill yourselves!

- K.H.